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What It Feels Like to Be Drunk — From an Alcoholic

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I’ve read a lot of shit on the internet about what it feels like to be drunk, and they’re always the same — they’re written by some fucking medical expert who talks about us drunks in the third person and obviously knows nothing more than what it feels like to be tipsy.

Not only that, but these laughable articles also pull their signs and symptoms of being drunk from a medical textbook.

I don’t know which is worse — hearing about what it feels like to be drunk from someone who has maybe been drunk once in their entire life, or hearing about what a doctor thinks being drunk feels like.

Because they don’t tell you what it feels like.

They tell you what being drunk looks like.

There’s a ton of “mights” in these articles too.

You might get overly emotional.

You might get super angry.

You might have to pee a lot.

Jesus Christ.

Like, no shit.

Anyone who knows even a little bit about alcohol knows about these symptoms and signs.

But what about what it feels like?

On the inside?

That’s what I want to talk about.

If you’re reading this article, I’m willing to bet a couple things.

First, I’m willing to bet you’ve never been drunk before.

Second, I’m willing to be you’re pretty young because most people who are older have experienced being drunk at least once in their lives.

So I’m going to tell you the exact truth about what it’s like.

I know this because I’m a real alcoholic.

I don’t just drink a little bit.

I don’t drink “too much.”

I drink until I fuck up my life.

I drink until I’m sick.

I drink until I puke, and then I start drinking again.

So I know what the fuck I’m talking about.

This is the answer you’re going to get that’s the truth — not some dipshit doctor’s idea of what it feels like to be drunk.

This Is What It Feels Like to Be Drunk

I want you to close your eyes.

I want you to imagine that you’re floating in the air.

I want you to imagine that your body is lighter than a dream.

I want you to imagine taking a step like this.

Taking a step while you’re floating in the air.

You stumble.

You flail around.

You might even start spinning.

But it’s a good spinning, at first.

It’s fun.

But it keeps going.

You spin and spin.

And then it becomes not so fun.

But even though you’re starting to feel sick from all this spinning, you’re still floating in the air.

You feel a cushion of air pressing in on you from all sides.

Even if you puke, you still feel that cushion, still float.

And up there, in the air, all your cares start to float too.

Float right away.

You stop giving a shit about the fact that your anxiety is so intense you can barely breathe.

You stop caring about the fact that your mom or your dad or your aunt or your brother or your husband or your girlfriend is a complete piece of shit.

Those things don’t seem to mean as much anymore.

They’re floating away while that cushion of air presses against your body and makes you feel held, makes you feel like everything is going to be okay.

I want you to imagine that air is warm.

And in that warm air, you feel like you can do anything.

You feel like you’re the athlete you’ve always wanted to be.

You feel like you can talk to any guy or girl you want to and that it will all be fine.

You feel like your face is filled with that flush of warmth that is holding your body.

You feel good.

That’s what it feels like to be drunk.

It feels fucking good.

Mostly….

For Some People, What It Feels Like to Be Drunk Is to Feel Like Shit

What I just described to you is what most people feel when they’re drunk.

However, there are people for whom there’s a different feeling.

They feel like the devil gets inside them.

Because maybe it was already there in the first place.

And that same feeling that you have of not caring, of being in that cloud.

That feeling takes away the barriers that keep them from hurting themselves and other people.

They stop giving a fuck about the rules.

And yeah, you might do that too when you’re drunk, but you’re not going to punch someone in the face because of it.

This person might.

This person has a lot of pent-up anger.

They have rage in their heart.

And the alcohol lets it out.

This is what it feels like to be drunk for some people.

They still float in the air.

But that air doesn’t soothe them.

It gives them power.

And they use that power to hurt other people.

What It Feels Like to Be Blackout Drunk

This is difficult to describe because blackout drunk means you don’t remember shit.

However, there’s a place that comes just before being completely blacked out where you remember flashes of what you’ve done and what happens to you.

To be honest, it just feels like what I’ve described to you, just at a higher level.

That warm air becomes so hot that you feel like you have to take your clothes off.

That spinning goes so fast you feel like you’re going to puke — and you probably do.

The good feeling goes away, and insanity starts to creep in.

Nothing makes sense.

Words stop making sense.

Actions stop making sense.

Little things become big things.

Someone makes a joke, and you lose your mind laughing because everything is suddenly hilarious.

Then someone says something that rubs you the wrong way, and suddenly you’re filled with anger, more than you’ve ever felt in your entire life.

Or worse, your feelings get hurt so bad that you start crying uncontrollably.

You basically become a toddler.

That’s what it feels like to be so drunk you blackout.

What Is Your Experience With Alcohol?

Look, I’m an alcoholic, and I do know a lot about alcohol, but that doesn’t mean I know everything.

I want to know about your experience.

You tell me.

Tell me what it feels like to be drunk in the comments.

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Adam Fout

I'm a speculative fiction and nonfiction writer. I have a B.A. in English and an M.A. in Professional and Technical Communication. I'm a graduate of the 2020 Odyssey Writing Workshop. I'm a regular contributor to Recovery Today Magazine, and I have been published in numerous literary magazines, including December, J Journal, and Flash Fiction Online, among others.

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