I'm an addiction / recovery / mental health blogger and a speculative fiction / nonfiction writer. I have a B.A. in English and an M.A. in Professional and Technical Communication. I'm a graduate of the 2020 Odyssey Writing Workshop. I'm a regular contributor to Recovery Today Magazine, and I've been featured on numerous recovery podcasts. I have personal experience with addiction and mental health. I have Substance Use Disorder (SUB), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Major Depressive Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED), and Binge Eating Disorder (BED), among others. I have been in numerous drug rehabs, detoxes, and mental institutions, so I understand from personal experience how the mental health system works. I have been published in numerous literary magazines, including December, J Journal, and Flash Fiction Online, among others. I LOVE when readers reach out to me! Always feel free to send me an email at awfout at gmail dot com. I can't wait to hear from you!
Depending on whom you ask, AA has a success rate of about 5–10%. And when I say “whom,” I mean people who actually study this shit — you know, scientists — not the schmuck old-timer at AA who likes to quote page 58 about, “rarely have we seen a person fail blah blah blah.” Let me back up a bit and say that I work…
An open AA meeting is just an AA meeting where anyone can go. By anyone, I mean anyone, whether you’re an alcoholic or not. Why Open AA Meetings Are Good There are a few things that make open AA meetings really great. The first thing is that, because anyone can go, it makes people who aren’t sure if they’re alcoholics or not feel more comfortable…
There’s a big difference between psychological dependence and physical dependence when it comes to drugs and alcohol. Psychological dependence is when you can’t stop thinking about whatever drug you’re doing. You’re obsessed with it. Obsession means a thought that you can’t get out of your head, no matter what you do. Many people think that there’s no such thing as psychological dependence, that all drugs…
I’ve read a lot of shit on the internet about what it feels like to be drunk, and they’re always the same — they’re written by some fucking medical expert who talks about us drunks in the third person and obviously knows nothing more than what it feels like to be tipsy. Not only that, but these laughable articles also pull their signs and symptoms of…
I recently won second place in the dreamers flash nonfiction contest for my true story, “A Chunk of Ice Tumbling in a Thunderstorm.” You can read it here.
According to the experts, spiritual fulfillment always has to do with a poorly defined definition of what the spirit is — namely, that it’s something that has nothing to do with reality, that it must have something to do with gods or spirits or a connection to the universe or some other religious or faux-religious bullshit. I reject this definition. I think that spiritual fulfillment…
What’s the difference between being a recovered alcoholic and a recovering alcoholic? We hear it all the time in AA. I’m a recovered alcoholic or recovered addict. I’m a recovering alcoholic or recovering addict. But what does that mean? Why do we say it? Recovering Alcoholic vs Recovered Alcoholic — Recovered = No More Pain Being recovered means that I don’t suffer anymore. I no longer…
Are there safe ways to get high? All the articles I tried to find on this subject were hilariously bad. Essentially, they would sidestep the issue and talk about ways to get high without drugs. I’m willing to bet you’re reading this article because you want to know how to get high on drugs safely. And I’m also willing to bet you’re not just interested…
Here’s what helps with Suboxone withdrawal. Suboxone withdrawal can be seriously shitty because suboxone has a long half-life and lasts a lot longer than many other types of opioid withdrawal. However, there are ways to deal with it. This might be controversial, but I believe that Suboxone is a horrible drug, and I believe that the best way to come off it without it being…
So, what does detox feel like? I can tell you from (far too much) personal experience that it’s not fun. In fact, depending on the drug you’re detoxing from, it can be horrible. Is that meant to scare you? That’s not my intention. These are just facts. There’s a reason addicts like me avoid detox at all costs. There’s a reason we try so hard…